Author Archives: Mel

Hard-Boiled Bodies — How I Need To Work Out

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I will (always and forever) appreciate the people who can tell me truth-things and not lie-things straight to my face.

A few months ago, I sat across from O., someone I give 50% credit to for pushing me to start JALBC and the rest of my dating coaching endeavors and I asked him to tell me what my sticking point was.

What he said was that it was my body, and not that I had a bad body but that I didn’t have the best body I could have. He added that “if this is what you looked like with watching your food and exercising regularly, I’d say that you’d have another sticking point but this is it.”

Tonight, I sat across from my best friend and he told me the same thing — that I’m out of shape.

Now don’t get me wrong, out of shape is a statement that is relative because I can run my miles and punch the bad guys but yeah, its true, I have been in better shape.

And before I could take offense and think the world is a shallow place, I realised that much like I have spent years nurturing my brain (proud papa!) and self-reflecting on my flaws and optimizing my better traits, I put my body to the wayside to focus on those “other things” and now, especially with school under my belt, I could put those other things aside and shift focus.

I’m honest enough with myself where I can admit that “oh yes, I want the triple threat body” solely for the sake of having a hot body but I know that more of it is that it shows a certain level of discipline, dedication, and so on.

And you know, you have a hot body.

So with that said, I had to look at the problems and reverse-engineer solutions.

  • Problem: I’m inconsistent because I get bored with my workouts OR when I get busy, my workouts fall to the side.
  • Solution: Vary workouts and keep them short enough to fit into a crazy schedule.
  • Problem: I need a visible goal to work toward (hot body doesn’t count).
  • Solution: Sign up for specific events that require training in regimented ways (Chicago Marathon, Tough Mudder).
  • Problem: When working out feels too much like a workout, I hate it.
  • Solution: Make working out something fun — CrossFit, Krav, boxing.
  • Problem: I have to have someone to stay accountable to.
  • Solution: Personal trainer. (Andre!)

Crisis averted.

Also: stop eating so many tacos.

On the day of our breakup

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Dear 2011,

I just wanted to take a few minutes today, on the day of our breakup, to talk about what happened between us over the last year. First of all, and I know this has been said before, it’s not you, it’s me that had to leave and you really didn’t do anything wrong. Except for your nickname, “twenty-eleven” – I really hope that doesn’t stick with 2012.

Thanks for living up to what my expectations were – “the best year ever” and so with that, I have a strong feeling your successor will do the same.

You were filled with beginnings (new lease, new job, some love) and endings (school, some love) hellos (everyone I met) and goodbyes (everyone I failed to meet again) but really what sticks with me is the joie de vivre we shared this year. Mornings with you, 2011, were a coffee scented breeze, a warm blanket, a half-hidden smile. You were not a cold tile floor, you were lovely and welcoming.

This means a lot, you know, because the way you start your day, well, that’s huge. Just like the way you end your day, letting your thoughts wander into everything and nothing, all the same. I have no regrets about you, 2011, not even the boy Dad said I shouldn’t kiss, or the one I know I don’t miss anymore or the time I pierced my nose again.

I won’t forget you — but I won’t be back.

Love,
Mel

Six Things Saturday

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When I was out playing darts last night (horribly, I might add) I noticed that my gorgeous friend Kylie was wearing a very floral dress over some tights and boots. And, there was no snow to be found anywhere in sight! Spring is definitely around the corner and I celebrated by taking advantage of the sale on Revlon cosmetics at Walgreens today.

Here are the six things making me very happy this Saturday!

Lovely coloured lip glosses from Revlon in (left to right) Coral Reef, Pink Pop, and Lilac Pastelle.

Pastel coloured nail polishes also from Revlon in (L to R) Electric and Minted. I painted my nails in Minted as soon as I got home!

And in the back, (FINALLY!) my new iPad 2 and its pink cover that Dad managed to snag from the Apple store in Boca Raton, FL on release day. He FedEx’d it over and I got it today! Thanks dad!

 

I’m Not Wearing Any Pants

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It’s an absolutely beautiful day in Chicago so I wore shorts and sandals on my way downtown to meet up for an afternoon drink. I love not wearing pants!!!

Happy Saint Patrick’s Day everyone!

Necklace from a random store in Lincoln Park, Jacket is from BCBG in 2006, Shoes are Aldo and bag is last season Coach. Skully scarf is from a thrift store.

[5 Things] — This Week’s Winners

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They’re not the same 5 things every week but I feel like, this week, these were the five things I couldn’t live without and so here is a shoutout to them.

5. Neutrogena Body Oil: I think this stuff costs about $8 at any pharmacy or retailer and it’s fantastic. When you live in cold weather climates (i.e., the frozen butt crack of the Midwest that is Chicago) your skin gets dry, fast and this stuff really helps. I use it when I come out of the shower and sometimes even on my hair to try and tame the wild beast. Unlike baby oil, it doesn’t leave your skin feeling oily and if you hate the smell, (I don’t); there’s an unscented version.

4. The Boots With The Fur: Ok, confession time here: I hate pants. I’m the new Lindsay-Lohan-“Mel, leggings-are-not-pants”-fashion-train-wreck but here’s the thing, I don’t care because leggings are just freaking comfy. Granted, I don’t wear them with short shirts like the famous DUI princess so it’s more acceptable although there is one flaw – leggings are as warm as say, thick trousers or jeans. Enter the “boots with the fur”. These are the warmest things I have ever put my feet into. Aldo had them on sale and even though I didn’t like salesgirl’s comment that “they looked way better on me because my legs aren’t as skinny as hers” [read: fat!] I plan on living in them for the rest of winter. (They’re the Aldo “Chirdon” boot ps!)

3. My “Snow Leopard” Hood: Bar the “furry” jokes and comments about anime conventions or dressing like a 5-year old…this is one of my most favourite pieces of clothing ever. Top reason: its warm. Close contender: it has secret pockets/hand pockets so if you forget your gloves a lot, which I do, its perfect and most importantly: it is easily the most attention grabbing and recognizable thing ever. In Chicago, where everyone looks the same in winter, I’ve been shouted at from across the street because a buddy recognized my headwear and let’s not forget all the people who have asked to touch my ears at bars. (If they’re cute, I let them).

2. North Face Parka: When I first moved to Chicago in 2009 as a naïve Florida girl who hadn’t owned winter gear since her emigration from Montréal in 1994, everyone I asked told me to buy a North Face coat and I did. I bought the Metropolis parka in cherry red (no longer available) because I wanted to stand out in the sea of black coats. The coat’s pretty good but it didn’t stand up to the wind that my city is known for and this year I decided to walk into the North Face and buy their “warmest coat ever” – the “Arctic” parka. Needless to say, someone swiped the shopping bag with my coat in it on the El…$300 down the tubes…which brings me to my next “can’t live without”.

1. American Express: Amex, I love you. Even though you’ve charged me a ridiculous fee every year for the past 6 years, I will happily keep paying it because you are the best credit card company ever (and no, this does not refer to my most recent discovery of my concierge service, through which I am in the process of acquiring a GIGANTIC bottle of wine, thank you!) This refers to the countless times you have bailed me out of otherwise awful situations, for example:

-       That time I flew to Montreal from London for New Year’s Eve and British Airways lost my bags for 48 hours (the entire trip was only 3 days) and when they finally brought back my bag it was SOAKING wet (including all its contents) and you, my trusty CC, gave me $500 to cover replacement clothing for the trip and the dry cleaning costs.

-       That time my BRAND NEW North Face coat was stolen from the El and you promptly refunded me the cost of it (plus the other items in the bag) and I was able to get another one! (This was two weeks ago)

-       That when I wanted to buy Blackhawks tickets last year, I got a discount because of you guys.

-       Your new “Get Currency” website – can I write for you? E-mail me!

Since I’ll be in the tropical, beautiful weather of Florida, et al starting tomorrow, I’m thinking next week’s “5 items” post will consist of bikinis and sunscreen (here’s hoping!)

Happy holidays!

Xox,

Mel

**This post is in no way sponsored or endorsed by any of the products I mentioned. These are just the words of a very very happy customer!


Digital Dating – Does It Change Things?

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I’m typing this post from my smartphone. Right before I started writing, I checked in for my flight back to Chicago, sent a picture to my dad, and logged into my online dating account.

Later today, ill tweet my client, video chat with my best friend from Florida, and text with someone I’m seeing.

If he knows what he’s doing, the text messages will be the right mix of flirtatious and genuine. They’ll leave me happy to have heard from him, a teaser of what being around him in person will feel like.

This doesn’t always happen. In some cases, I’m left wondering what’s up with the mixed signals. And, as someone who conveys her personality well over texting/tweeting and even (gasp) actual phone calls, it bores me when someone sounds flat any way but in person.

Realistically, most of us are busy today and most of us, thanks to things like iPhones and Androids and Skype can maintain close long distance friendships and relationships. But because were busy, sometimes we can’t even see our short distance significant others in person and its the cutesy texts and warm phone calls that keep us connected.

And, isn’t it true that our digital communication faux-pas can just as easily ruin our budding relationships as the right moves can make something happen? [Read: drunk dialing your fun fling?]

Thoughts?